In the words of Nina Simone (surprisingly well covered by Michael Buble):
“It's a new dawn, It's a new day, It's a new life, For me, And I'm feeling good.”
So, a new season then!
I broke my golden rule and went along to the Recreation Ground to watch our two home pre-season friendlies against Brizzle City and Colchesterford United and came away with an optimism I wish I hadn’t. The two games had been pretty entertaining, considering their status, and it seems the Doc had signed some pretty good players.
To use the hackneyed phrase often used by the gentlemen of the third estate (press hacks) the “acid test” (whatever that is) comes on the first day of the season. Yet again that first day sees us pitched against Accrington bleeding Stanley. Oh the glamour of the Football League!
Bill had informed me that he was going to France to test out his new motor home ready for his winter hibernation so I planned a solo sojourn for the first away trip. Having searched Late Rooms (via buy at of course) and failed to find a presentable B&B within 10 miles of Accrington, Maurice (Morris’ French cousin) and I headed for Chorley in Lancashire on Friday for an overnight stop. This meant we would avoid the inevitable traffic chaos on the M6 which would prove to be the undoing of several travellers on the Saturday. Chorley turned out to be a presentable little town and even the late night chavs seemed to have a certain politeness about them.
Having enjoyed a full English after a decent lie in Maurice was fired up for the short hop eastwards to the wonderful town of Accrington. The Crown pub was the destination again and having had my cheer up chat with Sparky, albeit interrupted by a chorus from the Phoenix Ultras on their way to the pub, I parked up and went in. Steve from Manchester was making a meal of parking in the cramped car park but it was his daughter’s car so he had an excuse probably.
Waiting inside the pub was AlanB - minus posse – and we soon engaged in conversation about our prospects. Why he, our ratings guru, would ask my opinion on players God only knows but we were soon joined by two thirds of the remainder of his gang who were only too happy to proffer their opinions. Tagging along was Flagboy (or FOD as he calls himself these days) and sitting a decent distance away from us ruffians was Oompah Loompah (just one of his monikers). Manc Bob turned up with his dad and then Northern Strays were almost complete. There were a couple of notable absentees though. I know Northern Monkey had repeated his holiday faux pas by booking a holiday down south for the first game of the season and can only assume Wakefield had done something similar. See you next time chaps?
The RBA soon arrived and raised the volume in the pub and the atmosphere became a little more raucous but no less friendly. Having only a snack in the pub, I set off to sample the fare at the ground. To my delight they had the traditional grub. Meat and potato pie, chips and gravy. Score one tick on the DWHALDTDWWT chart!
Sadly, that was where the good side of the day ended. The abysmal display on the pitch (apparently due to the pitch being wet) put a damper (no pun intended) on the actual event and it was a sign of this that the last hour of the match was spent largely in conversation on the terrace. The game itself became a bit of a side show and we were, frankly, relieved when the final whistle went. I suppose a 0-0 draw is better than a defeat but the excitement of the opening day was gradually and completely sucked out of us. What a shame.
The return trip south was pretty uneventful apart from having a bit of a race with what, at first, appeared to be a hairdresser (judging by the car). It wasn’t until I noticed the registration plate contained the letters “FOD” that I realised I had seen the car before outside the Brampton in Torquay and it was, indeed, the one and only Flagboy! Maurice versus the hairdresser’s car was never going to be a contest really – especially when the hairdresser has to roll a fag at 80 mph!
Arriving back in the south I checked the message board for the “just back” comments and I think the general consensus agreed with me that, because of the disappointing lack of entertainment and the fact that Accrington’s ground makes the Rec look like the San Siro, the verdict has to be:-
No, we didn’t have a lovely day the day we went to Accrington.
Ancient Shot